Human

Dear Blog,

I have often thought about the future. The kind of impact I will have on the world, more specifically. I dream of my name in a textbook at some point, if only there by mere mention. I also wish I can bring with my presence a change in the world so great that the media reports on my death. It's a train of thought that is a bit self-serving, I know. But it's the fact that I could improve the world, leaving it better than when I found it, that brings me the most joy. But the more I dwell on the fantasy, the more I realize how far off from reality it might be. I don't have much to my name at the moment, and I imagine that I won't for some time. Which is fine, until I learn more about the people I hold in high regard. I see that they had created these wonderful and meaningful things early in their lives before they continued into their lives at force speed, accumulating so much to their reputation that it intimidates me to even read about them. I look at these examples and I think to myself "How can I attain status like that? How can I leave my mark on the world for the betterment of mankind?" I don't have a clear-cut answer to that yet, but as I ponder (during an early morning eight-hour desk shift over the Thanksgiving holiday break, I should point out), I begin to realize one simple fact. Every role model I have, any person that wish to compare myself to, any of these accomplished individuals have a common connection to one another and me: they're human.

Human; simple creatures that have done incredible things. NASA  

It's an odd realization, but it was mentioned over our staff retreat and it didn't click until learning more about a couple of influential people. The first of which is Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs died October 5, 2011, earlier this year, and following his death, the media reacted strongly, as did a huge portion of his fans. He was described as a genius, a revolutionary, a brilliant inventor of modern life, and a great leader. His story is remarkable. An adopted son, built one of the world's first personal computers in his garage with his best friend, Jobs dropped out of college, created and improved up ideas that made his company Apple a huge success all while in his twenties. He was then ostracized from his own company, helped create Pixar, rebuilt Apple when it started to fail after leaving the company years earlier, revolutionized the digital music industry and paved the way for mobile computer in huge ways. He was a huge factor in the way Western civilization operates now.
And Jobs was human. He was described as a tyrant and a bully. He yelled at people and he belittled them. He heavily borrowed ideas and branded them as his own, and was an opportunist in sometimes the negative sense. He could be short with people, using them for his own goals and then casting them aside. He demanded results as he envisioned the potential of the future, pushing others to go the extra mile to reach his lofty ends. He trashed talked competitors and shrugged off people he didn't want to bother with.
Jobs was also a caring husband and loving father. He friendships meant a lot to him, often talking long walks with his friends, talking about anything from the business and health to the meaning of life. He appreciated the beauty of the natural world and sought to convey the simplicity of design into all Apple products. He valued creativity and innovation. He was always pushing into the future. He saw a future world and tried to bring the rest of us into that world.
The only face of Jobs I ever saw that the "one more thing" keynote speeches and beaming face paired with iPods and Pixar. After his death I learned more. And I gained a further respect as I learned more. Coupled with his charm was a charisma that was borderline frightening. Hard work got Steve Jobs to a point. It was that tenacity and biting-edge personality that he was able to access at the right moments which ultimately brought him the great success of Apple Inc. Jobs wasn't a saint, he was a man. And I should keep that in mind as I go about my life. I am a man, too. I make mistakes, I fumble, and I don't have to be the nicest guy in every situation. I aim to be well-mannered and positive as often as I can, but "speaking softly and carrying a big stick" is a philosophy that I should begin to definitely adhere to. I don't need to yell at everyone, but I shouldn't shy from the chance that I might have to take an aggressive stance. I don't take pleasure in having that scenario in my repertoire, but I feel like if I plan to change the world in some way, even a small one, I should grow into a well-rounded individual (which happens to include this social tool).

Apple Logo Tribute: 1955-2011 by Johnathan Mak

Another model of success is Conan O'Brien. I have long wished for a stand-up career and to host a late night talk show. It's a dream of mine that I've let fall away. The odds are long and the pay until reaching national fame is feeble. But O'Brien stands out as a success because of the NBC debacle that happens a couple years ago. In January 2010, after the show had been on for only seven months, NBC announced that it was going to move Jay Leno from prime time back to his original time slot, forcing O'Brien's show to start after midnight. In response,  O'Brien released a press statement saying that he would not continue as hot of The Tonight Show if it was moved to any time after midnight to accommodate The Jay Leno Show. In January 2010, after the show had been on the air for seven months, it was announced that NBC was intending to move Jay Leno from prime time back to his original time slot, forcing O'Brien's show to start after midnight. In response to the announcement, O'Brien released a press statement saying that he would not continue as host of The Tonight Show if it was moved to any time after midnight to accommodate The Jay Leno Show. He feared it would ruin the long and rich Tonight Show tradition. After two weeks of negotiations, NBC announced that they had paid $45 million to buy out O'Brien's contract, ending both his tenure as host as well as his relationship with NBC after 22 years.

Following that separation, Conan was incredibly upset. His anger affected him in a great way. Conan was legally prohibited from appearing on the television or Internet for a few months. He went on tour as he dealt with the emotions that he had regarding the mistreatment he felt by NBC. After that tour, Conan took a short break and then began a late night show on TBS.

I supported Conan through his rough transition and the aftermath of his decision. I followed him on Twitter and taped up a poster on my door showing my allegiance to Team Coco. It wasn't until later, while watching a documentary the followed Conan that I saw the troubled and stressed Conan O'Brien that was hidden when performing on stage and front of camera crews. He was very short with people, incredibly rude and sarcastic, and generally depressed for much of his time on tour. I saw his smiling face at night prior to the show's cancellation. And now I see this overworked and heartbroken man.

Conan O'Brien is a man, too. It was his dream for most of his life to be the host of The Tonight Show and that dream was given to him and subsequently taken away from him. It was torn from him thanks to executives. Knowing this, and seeing him outside of performances, I couldn't help be value his work more. Despite all that he'd personally gone through, he still met with fans and performed. We was so angry for so long, but that didn't hinder his commitment to his craft. He might have been unemployed, but his never stopped working.

That drive is something I aspire for. I don't think I'll ever catch a break and make it to New York or Hollywood, but in whatever job I have, I wish to work as hard as I can, even if it isn't required of me. He's a family man and a comedian. He does what he loves, even when life stands in his way. I admire that greatly.

Team Coco Wallpaper

I have no idea how poorly written my early morning ramble is, but I hope it isn't too bad. I just wanted to jot down my thoughts about a couple of personal role models. They are far from perfect, but what man isn't? We're all human, and the sooner I can learn that, the sooner I can let go and forgive myself and move into the next phase of changing the world.


Until Next Time!
-Daniel Golden

Faith

Dear Blog,

I was asked by a friend a simple question. She asked "What do you believe in, Daniel?" And I didn't have the right words to say. Half of me wanted to say "I Believe in Harvey Dent," and move on, but this conversation felt like it would have far greater potential if I was as honest as I could be with her. She wasn't a college student who felt like she had all the answers. She wasn't going to correct me. She was grounded and she was willing to listen. So we talked.

Publicity wallpaper for the movie The Dark Knight.

Now the answer to that question would have been easy to answer a few months ago. I thought it was clear then. But my faith has recently been in the forefront of my mind, under some reevaluation and re-configuring. I felt a need to reexamine it. My appendicitis wasn't bad at all, and thanks to modern medicine, was hardly a threat at all. But the potential it held to devastate me was still there.

In the following days of healing, I thought to myself how things might have been if things didn't go as well as they did. How would my funeral play out? Would people even know what my wishes would be? How would my parents treat my remains? Did I even have my own opinions on such matters? So I thought for a long while. What I wanted, what I needed. What felt silly and what felt right.
Those ideas transitioned into thinking about my faith. What did I believe in? What did I hold true? What resonated within me? And what did I not subscribe to?
It's never an easy question to answer. And I doubt I could accurately convey the intricacies of faith in my blog (not because it's extremely complicated, but my faith evolves and I don't know if I can ever pin it down). But now I feel like this is something I should do.

The Thinker by Rodin

I guess to begin, I don't like the rituals of religion. Stated simply, I like the idea that my fraternity stands by. That continuing a practice purely for the sake of tradition is the poorest reason for doing so. I feel like a portion of religious ceremonies are tradition and continued on that basis alone. A sort of "we've always done it like this so we will always do it like this." Not all ceremonies are like that, I realize. Some have a rationale behind it. But the institution of religion largely conveys a ritualistic stance in regards to worship and practicing one's faith. So on the whole, I don't like religion. I don't hate it, I don't think it should be abolished. But it's not my cup of tea.

On that note, The Holy Bible is not a book that I've read completely or a book I feel contains the direct word of God. There are a lot of books that claim to have divine influence. I don't think any of them should be discarded. They are valid works of literature. And it's got some good ideas in them. For example, the Bible says that you shouldn't murder people and don't steal stuff. Makes sense to me. But it's got some bad ones, too. The rules for owning people (slavery) doesn't appeal to me at all and there is a lot of killing ordered by God. I can see the father-like qualities of "do as I say, not as I do." My dad smokes and tells me that I shouldn't. I understand that. But if my dad told me not to kill people and then turns around and fired a few rounds into my neighbors' heads and told me to then loot their house, I'd be less likely to respect him. I understand that it was written at a time different from our own, but that harsh contradictory element makes me shy away from viewing the Bible as a source for spiritual enlightenment.
I don't think negatively of those who use the Bible as a source for enlightenment, though. Like I said, it has merit as a great work of literature. Those who study the Bible outside of the academic realm and use it as a guideline for spiritual growth find comfort in it and that isn't a false feeling predicated on a flawed book. It's a awakening sparked by a series of writings with which they personally interrupt. I don't use the Bible, but that doesn't lessen the impact it has.

Not the only source for enlightenment, nor is it my source.

But I do believe in a soul. I believe the mankind is so wonderful. And by extension, I believe in God. Mankind has been blessed by God with a soul. Kinda.

We evolved into the creatures of reason that we are today by natural selection over incredible amounts of time. Slowly, from simple mammals to space-faring marvels of biology, we grew. And through a bit of poetry, the moment that we gained that penchant for reason is the moment we could envision the concept of God. Perhaps that's the way He likes it?
Because there is more to us than what we're made of. Classic "the whole is greater than the sum of its parts" way of thinking. The twelve particles of matter make the atoms that make the elements that make the components that make the physical man. The four forces of nature affect us constantly, including the electromagnetic force of nature which allows for the functions of our central nervous system, including the brain.
But there is that intangible, immeasurable, ungraspable soul of men. That untouchable pool from where we can draw from to create the grandest scores for orchestras, to paint frescas that adorn walls worldwide, to plan the sublime architecture in every city, to write the millions of stories we love. That source from where we feel the sharpest pain over the loss of a loved one or the crush of relationship gone awry. The same place that we have the greatest capacity for love unseen on this planet before. Mankind has done awe-inspiring things. Mankind has plans for even greater things. And I feel that we've done it on our own.
I believe that from our soul spurs the compassion, cruelty, and ingenuity of mankind. And God set the universe into motion and hasn't hindered our progress of evolution into beings of astounding power. I don't think He pointed to man and said "Eh, sure, those guys can have souls now." But the existence of that inert capacity to go beyond being fantastic biological machines and to have that soul to evades any sort of scientific classification shows me that there is something else in this universe beyond those twelve particles of matter and four forces of nature. And that something else is God.

Are souls limited to mankind? Do animals have them? Computers? So many questions that stem from the notion that makes answering the initial question so difficult.

It's hard to define God, though. I don't pray to God. I don't think God can respond to prayers. Well, He could, but He doesn't. I'm sure He can hear them. But He doesn't have a place to react. I like to think to myself that God caused the red light to appear just as my favorite song starts to play on the radio, allowing me to enjoy it in its entity.
But I feel like God is beyond that. More than an omnipotent man in the sky considering to attend to the requests of a prayer, but an entity so vast that He becomes pervasive in everything, like gravity. An additional force of nature. The potential for change is there, but His awareness that tipping one domino over would lead to the collapse of the detailed universe He created would be a main deterrent for intervention. If He actually created the universe, that is, instead of just exploding into reality like everything else did during the Big Bang. The universe, by definition, contains everything, so it'd include God. He isn't outside of the universe, He's a part of it. Perhaps He is just flowing along with everything else. He governs the laws of that spiritual part of man, I guess. I honestly don't know because I'm not God.

Luke's Lesson by Jacob A. Pfeiffer
An illustration of the Force, an invisible but binding force in the Star Wars universe.

I know that I'm writing about God using the conventions of the King James Bible, capitalizing God and references to Him. I don't think I would interrupt that as how I view God, but more so it is in line with the poetic aspect of discussing God. The classic method, so to speak.
Because faith is an abstraction. And abstractions are beautiful and brilliant. They aren't things you can point to. And neither is God. They are all just past the physical. And that beauty is poetry in my eyes.
And I guess I should add that references to the human species as "man" and "mankind" derive from the classical poetic approach and not a sexist point of view.

Just a point of clarification.

Now the next step in this voyage of self discovery is how I would in the event of my death. What would want? To be honest, I won't be at my funeral. At least, not in any way that would matter. So I'd hope whoever takes charge on my funeral preparations would accommodate to the needs of those in attendance, not to me. Of course, the circumstance of my death would be a factor when choosing how to display my remains. A gruesome mauling by a bear wouldn't lend itself well to an open casket funeral, but if I died in my sleep without any grotesque aftereffects, I wouldn't mind being dolled up a bit for the show. If science wants my body before I'm buried away, they can use it.
As for a burial, as I said, whatever is best for those in attendance. I think a grave in a graveyard would take up precious space on this Earth, but it would provide a somewhat picturesque landscape for anyone wanting to visit. Cremation would save space (and allows for my ashes to possible to scattered in outer space), but I don't know if visiting a pot of ashes has the same effect for people as those visiting a tombstone. Ultimately I think I'll leave it up to whoever will be visiting me the most, if anyone will at all.
In the end, death signals the separation of the soul from the physical realm. Where does it go? No idea. I like to think it's how people come closer to God. We join in on that fifth force of the universe, so to speak. Perhaps it is peaceful. I like to think the soul we have is eternal. It doesn't take up space in the cosmos, so it is permitted to stay after death.

"Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not." Jedi Master Yoda

I'm not sure what else to add on the subject. I'll write another entry to address questions. Though I'm not sure if I'll have any answers. I'll leave you with a fun clip, so as not to feel like this entry was "too deep" or anything.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Pause

Dear Blog,

I haven't had the smoothest time these past few weeks. School is tough. Work is exhausting. My social life is hardly what it used to be. I had an appendectomy and missed a week of everything. I'm struggling to find motivation for a lot of things. I'd nearly given up.

But I paused.

In the midst of all that I had to do, despite every assignment, deadline, test, project, and promise, I paused. And in that pause, I sought out some comfort. I didn't want to bother my friends and I couldn't afford leaving the building. I needed to do this on my own. I needed to find something that would make me strive to continue. The extra push to help me this semester. Or at least until the next break.

I found the Symphony of Science again.

Science set to music. It was simple. It was powerful. It was perfect.

Thank you, Symphony of Science. Thank you very much.

Until next time,
-Daniel Golden

Just Be Yourself

Dear Blog,

If you would allow it, Blog, I'd like to write to you a response to another blog post. The question posed by that entry:
"They always tell you that when you’re trying to make friends or get a girl/guy. “Just be yourself!” But can we really? What does it even mean? They tell you not to act differently just to “fit in” or whatever. Why not? I think it’s nearly impossible to not change ourselves at least a little bit depending on who we’re hanging out with. It’s probably not such a bad idea either."

Key phrase: "Some People" 

And my simple reply to that blog is this. That when they say "just be yourself" whenever you're talking to someone you like, a job interview, or any of life's wonderful social dimensions, that you should be true to yourself. You shouldn't emulate another person's voice, stance, or opinions. "Just be yourself" is more of a gentle reminder that being yourself isn't a bad thing. It's a support for when you wish you were a champion pianist when you're chatting to that cute music major, or the volunteer firefighter who just happened to save an orphanage when you're applying for a job.

A little harsh, but the point is understood.

"Just be yourself" is saying that yes, you'll change an aspect of yourself to fit the situation at hand. Professional in an interview, fun and flirty on the dance floor. But don't suppress your urges to at least mention something you like, and definitely don't lie about liking something else. She's a cute girl dressed as a Vulcan science officer, but she'll Vulcan Nerve Pinch in a heartbeat if you act like you're into Star Trek and fail to know what the Kobayashi Maru is or its significance in the timeline of James Tiberius Kirk.

"I don't believe in a no-win scenario."

"Just be yourself" is your chance to shine, too. You've never met Person A. First impressions matter. Do you do straight into your encyclopedic knowledge Star Wars lore? Probably not. But don't shy from Lucas's saga if it is mentioned. You know all about Ewoks and the other movies Person A might like if they think Ewoks are cute (Caravan of Courage: An Ewok Adventure and its sequel Ewoks: The Battle for Endor). You might have to scale back a bit and avoid mentioning that those cute Ewoks Person A loves so much actually were intended to be Wookiees until Lucas decided Wookiees were technolgically competent and he wanted a primitive race to defeat the Empire in Return of the Jedi (or that Ewok is Wookiee switched around; or that it was originally titled Revenge of the Jedi). Information overload gives a bad impression more so than the content of the information.

And you thought all Ewoks were cute.

"Just be yourself" is advice given often. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But if being yourself results in not getting a phone number, then consider that a blessing. If that person doesn't like who you are, then odds are you wouldn't like being on a date with them. If being yourself loses you an interview, then if you had actually worked there, you'd probably be miserable the entire time you were employed there.

No one is better qualified to be you than you are.

So that's about all I have to say about being yourself. It's probably to wisest advice I can give to someone talking to someone else. Honesty is the best policy, after all, right?

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Changes

Dear Blog,

It has been a very long time since I've visited you. So long, in fact, that you've changed! You've got a new format for me to work with, and a lot of interesting improvements (let's see what I can do!). I have to say that this comes as little surprise, because Netflix has changed its business model (and made a new company for DVDs called Qwikster), George Lucas has changed Star Wars (who knew there was more to do?), and Facebook has been recently revamped (no complaints on that).

"I have altered the movies. Pray I don't alter them further."

And you know what? I've changed, too. In a positive way, no less. I'll admit, I still have times of self doubt. I still think down on myself. Every now and again I don't like what I see in the mirror. But overall, life is looking up. The shadows of the past no longer lurk in the corners of my mind. In a sense, I lit a new flame to shine on my heart. And with this enlightened soul, I've made progress in a few areas of my life.

First, school has been reviewed in my mind. I have a new approach and I'm enjoying it more. I feel like I'm actually able to move forward in a career and be successful. I have a plan and will start working on it as soon as I can. Things will come together if I keep a steady pace.

Second, work has been very interesting. Throughout training, the stress of preparation was manageable. Until the work I had to do increased as the days went on. My role as returner was utilized more than I thought was needed. And I even went above and beyond what was required of me, only to be told that it wasn't good enough. Things have settled down though, and everyone has started to find their place in the framework of the ResLife job. My bosses are more confident now, and my fellows new RAs are able to stand on their own.

Not Ra, Resident Assistant

Third, my personal life has been improved. I've come to a resolution, to a closure, and I can start again within the realm of one troubling relationship. And in another, I feel as though I've found a good balance among many factors. And new friendships abound with my RA colleagues in Woods House. It's been lovely! I even wrote them all a quick poem based off the floor themes on the building. Granted, not every relationship has had the greatest time these past few months. Sometimes the emotions ran deep and strong to the point of heartache. I wrote to you in the hardest time of despair. I never sent off the message. But looking back on what has happened, I hope only the best is yet to come out of it all.

Being an RA in Woods House for a second year has proven (so far) to be a fantastic decision. Last year was great, and this year has the potential to be better for me. How? Well, in a nutshell, I'm much more active within the group. I've almost taken on the job the job Nikki did. A sort of mother to the group. Father? Eh, parental unit. I've provided medicine when the staff was sick, I've written a poem to wish them luck with their new student leader roles, I've bought muffins, draw poorly illustrated whiteboard stories, personalized notes, and provided resources when I could. I thrive on that feeling of helping others. It's not pure altruism, but that's okay.

I do want to write more often, Blog, I really do. I hope this entry really gets me back into the habit. Maybe I should find another 30 Days thing to do. Or I'll just focus on what I'm feeling. Who knows what that might lead to?

It says: "I've learned to express my anger through my writing instead."

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Press Start

Dear Blog,

I have no idea how to vlog. I've watched videos on the subject, read articles for tips, and even purchased some neat cameras for the task at hand. But I still don't know what I'm doing. Every time I start, I give up fifteen minutes later because nothing seems right. I feel off when I record my vlogs. So what do I need to do? Wait to be in Woods House, where I'm motivated by my job? Do I need to seek out a friend to vlog to, Vlogbrothers style? I know you don't have any answers, Blog, but it's a tad frustrating. I like the idea, and I feel like I would be good at it. But I fail. Not an epic fail, but I'm not getting anywhere.

In high school, I was in a television journalism class. And in class, I feel like I did a fine job with the broadcasts that I made. Vlogging, in a sense, is that class. So why can't I start something? Blah, this is a tad frustrating.

On a more playful note, I've been trying to play Star Wars Galaxies a bit before the servers go offline at the end of the year. I'm looking forward to The Old Republic a great deal, but I have fond memories of SWG. I'm installing the game on my laptop again. It seems like my character is intact. My possessions aren't as stable, though. I doubt I'll be able to do much in the economy. I won't complete any quests. About all I will do is grab a land speeder and seek out all the Star Wars landmarks in the game. Perhaps I could grab some screenshots for you (no promises, though). It'll be like a mini-vacation before school starts. Unless there is heavy combat. I don't think I could survive that. I'm just a Level 90 Master Droid Engineer. Or at least I was. I might labeled as a Trader now. I recall the ability to build Battle Droids now, too. Who knows what awaits Adnil Nedlog in the Chilastra Galaxy (if it still exists).

Even if I ultimately play for only a day, at least I get to fly in space again.

Until next time!

-Daniel Golden

Lady of Time

Dear Blog,

Here is a poem.

"Lady of Time"
by Daniel Golden

Dear Lady of Time:
Do you hear the bells chime?

Wait? What? No bells?
Milady, that only tells
Me that you’re sound
Of mind, and grounded
To the reality to surrounds
You and your crown
Of pretty sea shells.

Crown of what-the-heck?
Hold on, just a sec
As I reread my latest blunder
Which occurs only whilst the thunder
Rolls on over and under,
Filling the air with the wonder
Of lethal nature as we stand on the flight deck.

I did it again, milady;
Making my words very odd and shady.
I just want to convey
That we could someday
Log on and start to play
Games that feature an array
Of weapons to kill that Level 20 Nazi zombie.

You take notes with a smile so bright,
That it’s near blinding to my subpar sight.
And I wear The One Ring to impress
My geeky independence
To you in hopes that you’ll address
Some feelings to profess
To the nerd behind you who could be your Jedi Knight.

So, Lady of Time, before you walk through the doors:
Allow me the honor to escort you to a showing of Star Wars?

Photo Credit

It's a little odd, definitely awkward. But genuine, right? I like it, although I'm not sure you will, Blog.
Maybe I can expand on this one? I'm not sure if it even works to begin with, though. Oh well, it's an older poem to start off, and the slight edits I just made before posting here might be all I can do when it comes down to it.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Darkness and War

Dear Blog,

The dark. It's been a long while since I've been scared of it. I don't fear monsters in my closest or aliens outside my window. Bumps in the night are usually residence hall neighbors, or just the protests of an old building bombarded with each year's changes. The quiet air is calming after a long day of loud bass and the lively laughing of tenants. When my ceiling light switches off and the numerous screens in my room power down, only the glow of street lamps flow onto my bed. The moon, nearly full these past few days, aids in illuminating the floor as I pace.

I pace in the dark. I lay in the dark. I rock back and forth in the dark. All until the sun wakes up and my body can no longer resist the need for sleep. It's not on purpose. Perhaps my sleep schedule is off? Maybe I drink too much caffeine during the day? No matter the cause, I feel I fear the nights I spend in my room on my own. Not a fear for my life, nor a fear for my health. A fear for my sanity, in some small regard, maybe.

My body must know of the dreams I have in the midst of night. Chaos and confusion, submission, loss of hope, misguided actions, loss of direction. A fading path leading away from who I want to me and into a boy I dare not aspire to be. My body wants me to avoid the chance for another nightmare. Evade another scenario to be played right behind my consciousness. Aware, but trapped by my mind's film. An unwilling actor in unlikely events. An unwilling actor in sad roles. Lured by the promise of heroics, crushed by the time credits roll. Betrayed by my mind's villains. I applaud the efforts I unknowingly take to remind myself why I stare out into the world from time to time. I try to forget, but that's not an option now, is it?

I need to acknowledge my thoughts, I know. I need to know what I dread. But I wish to sleep now. Spare me the violence and disappointment on my depressed dreamworld, my dearest mind. The dark should be a relief. The end of another day. I want to relish in the completion of it. Another day I survived on this Earth. Not another day to worry. I don't want to be conditioned to fear the night, to live the day whilst preparing for a long night. Let me move on. I can tackle the real terror. But not at night. Not in the dark on my room. Alone, yes. But wait until the light shines my field of vision. Grant me that luxury, sweet mind of mine. Give me a chance.

I like to think of myself as a good man. A decent man. Someone who is patient, playful, and posed in an image of my true self. A good man. And in the coming weeks, this good man will go to war. Because I will win the battle. I will conquer my demon and I will stand tall. But I have to wait until the morning. I have to wake for a better day. A brighter day. Not in this night, not in this darkness. I can do it if I must. But I shouldn't. I didn't pick my adversary, but I should be able to pick the time of conflict. So permit me each night's rest, body and mind, and let me plan for war another time on another day.

Until next time,
-Daniel Golden

The Island of Misfit Toys

Dear Blog,

It’s been nearly a month since I last wrote to you. Though it may seem like I haven’t had anything to write about, quite the opposite is the truth. A month ago, my biggest concern was reading, which I’m happy to report has actually come to a mild sort of fruition. I finished “Prisoner of the Daleks” a few days ago, in addition to the TARDIS Handbook. I enjoyed both of them immensely. My sister drove down here to Springfield from home to drop off the Harry Potter series for me to read again. I feel like familiar material will help fuel my desire to read. Plus, the Harry Potter series is a lot of fun to read. I doubt I’ll finish before seeing the final film, but it will still be fun.

I haven’t written anything (more on that in a minute). But since Netflix now has the rights to Star Trek, I’ve begun to watch The Original Series from the start. I currently count two episodes featuring Kirk doubled, and another two episodes with women who are not as they appear to be (three of both instances if you count “The Cage”; but she had no control over her appearance and the second Kirk didn’t perform any sort of malice in that pilot episode). Very good stories, so far. I’m glad I’ve got this opportunity.

I broke up with my girlfriend, too. In no means fun like reading Doctor Who or watching Star Trek, but an event that’s happened, nonetheless.

In a very brief (and hardly comprehensive) recap:
-I was having doubts in regards to the relationship. I couldn’t place if the doubts were due the nearly month long separation between the spring semester and the summer semester when she’d return, or they were vested my changing feelings for her.
-During that month, I talked to a lot of my friends, trying to gain more viewpoints. Unfortunately, lot of them said I should just end it. Upon hearing that, Blog, I was a bit agitated. So did that mean I should still date her if I felt like that? I felt something. But I couldn’t pinpoint what it was.
-I talked to her about my feelings when she got back and not wanting to just give up hope, opted to continue our previously planned trip to her house for Six Flags/her Taekwondo Black Belt Test/her brother’s birthday. I had hoped that the following couple of weeks, plus the extended weekend trip would rekindle something inside of me. A spark to light a flame, perhaps. I didn’t want to give up. I wanted to try. So I did.
-The weekend was a lot of fun. Driving to and fro from Springfield and St. Louis was fun. Nice conversations and Veggie Tale songs. We had a great time at Six Flags (only minor sunburn on her head). She passed her Black Belt Test with flying colors (the best candidate testing from what I saw). And her brother’s celebrations were nice. I bought him a replica Harry Potter wand (and miniature wands for her other siblings). I enjoyed spending time with her and her family (and her siblings enjoyed my Kinect).
-But all in all, I didn’t feel like a flame was ignited. During the weekend, I was honest with her. I did things on my own free will. She didn’t trick me, guilt me, or anything. I held her on occasion, and I kissed her. I love her; don’t get me wrong, Blog. She is near and dear to me. The chance for long, worthwhile conversations and playful teasing is still there. And common interests prevalent. But for now, it seemed my feelings had shifted from romance to friendship. A great friendship, mind you. But dating her didn’t fit with me very well.
-So after many tears, we broke up. And soon after that, we played co-op on Portal 2 and had a good time solving puzzles. We aren’t the greatest Portal 2 team, but we get to the finish line eventually.

So that’s how it stands. We’re best friends. A bit awkward, it’s true. What to say, what not to say, physical boundaries and the like. But that will iron out over time. I’m still there for her if she needs someone. And she’s someone I can run to if I need it.

On that note, of needing someone, Blog, let me apologize to you. As I mentioned earlier, I haven’t been writing. In fact, aside from text messages and the occasional Facebook chat, I rarely write anything. So here I am, out of practice, writing a ton of stuff to you. In a sense, without you, Blog, I probably would be staring out my window right now until my eyes couldn’t stay open.

I say that, because for the past few weeks, leading up to a couple of days ago, I was not motivated to do anything. I’d essentially lost all interest in the world around me. I couldn’t find pleasure in nearly all the things that bring me pleasure. Be it Doctor Who, Star Wars or Star Trek, video games, anything. When I was around other people, I giggled at the thought I being able to watch Star Trek via Netflix and laughed at the Doctor Who remarks. But in my room alone, I lacked the drive to watch Netflix. I couldn't bring myself to turn on my Xbox 360 or TV. I couldn’t be productive in any sense. I was, for most intents and purposes, anhedonic.

In addition to the apparent anhedonia I experienced, I slept for the better part of the week. My room lay unkempt for days. It was easy to shrug it off and claim it as my right as a college male. But looking back on it now, this wasn’t me. I strove to have a clean room while I was in college. I made my bed each day, recycled whenever possible, and woke up easily each day. My aim was not to be like the two roommates I had my first two years in college. But from the start of this spring semester, I slowly lost my touch. My Woods House room had things piled on the floor constantly. My bed was rarely made. I struggled to wake up each morning. And the summer semester had not been kind. With an online class, I rarely need to wake up in the morning, so I usually got out of bed by one in the afternoon.

I know what this pointed to. I was depressed. Not down in the dumps for a bit. But depressed. Heck, I still am. But now I know I am. And I’m sure I know why. It’s not easy to say, but my past relationship led to this. I don’t like pointing blame. It’s not what I do. But the abuse simply haunts me even now. I can’t ignore the impact it’s made. Doing that would be unwise. It’s a reality, however unpleasant.

It’s hard to wake up knowing what happened. To realize each day that it could happen to me again and I might not even notice it. I feel like my whole being was compromised because of that relationship. Weak when compared to the rest of the world. Who I am, what I do, how I act, how I think. I thought I was in the clear for life, that this was the person I wanted to be. But I was betrayed. Turned against myself, all because I was manipulated by her. I doubted myself. I still do. Was I wrong? Defective? She said I was. It’s hard to undo something like that in my mind, even after the break-up. I feel disconnected to the world now. A split-second apart from the universe. Out of phase, so to speak. The world is tangible but beyond my grasp. Bethany helped me along, to get me feeling like myself again. Immersing myself in the world of Doctor Who for a bit, being a big kid. But to lean on her would be wrong, especially when I my feelings shifted. Nikki has always been there, too. An anchor through turbulent storms. Allowing me to do whatever I want. Virtually care-free is I’d like to be. But to lean on anyone too long would be unhealthy. I need to rectify this on my own. I didn’t cause the damage. It’s not my fault. It’s not my fault. I am not defective. But I still have a broken soul to patch up. A soul that needs better protection for the coming future. A soul that will find its way back to the rest of the universe over time.

Blog, I’m not all right. Nor am I entirely bad. I will be better in the future. For now, I'm in a state of repair. A work in progress. I will be able to look at my reflection one day and not feel like a broken toy. But in the meantime, I will sit on the Island of Misfit Toys and I will tend to my wounds. Some will be easier to fix, others will leave scars. But I will work at it. I will mend them. I won’t hide them. The end product will feature a stronger version of myself. But I still need to work at it. Patchwork progress and patience. One step at a time.

Until next time,
-Daniel Golden

The Library

Dear Blog,

Although this summer has started off on an odd foot (crazy desk shifts, over-worked as the RA on Duty via an onslaught of check-outs, suddenly moving to a new room and given the chance to interact with Freshman again), it's provided me the chance to utilize a fantastic resource of the Springfield community: the public library. I've known about the library for a long while, but never actually signed up so that I could check things out. During a break in my summer schedule (an oasis of sorts), I opted to go look around one of the branches of the library system. I have been missing out. So many things to check out from the library. Including Doctor Who things, to my surprise.

After checking out graphic novels for a few days, it dawned on me that I haven't read a good book in a while (outside of required reading for class, that is). That upset me a bit, because I recall reading quite a bit when I was younger. I do want to return to a regular reading schedule. But so far, I lack the drive to read. Why should I read when I can easily watch a Netflix movie or play a video game? The movie and game provide near immediate entertainment, whereas a novel requires a significant time commitment in order to enjoy. I am aware of my faults in this regard, but I can't seem to get past it. The library has provided me a good opportunity to spark my reading flame (hmm, maybe I shouldn't be using fire imagery in reference to books). I've checked out a Doctor Who story.



Doctor Who: Prisoner of the Daleks by Trevor Baxendale. It seems to feature the Tenth Doctor without a companion, which should make for an interesting read. It's due back to the library in ten days, so hopefully I will start to read it soon. I have training the next few days, so perhaps I'll read it during any free time that we might be granted.



Doctor Who: Apollo 23 by Justin Richards is a Doctor Who book I really want to read. It features the Eleventh Doctor, my personal favorite, and it seems that "The Doctor discovers one last great secret that could save humanity: Apollo 23." With a line like that, how could I resist. Sure, Apollo 23 seems a bit too close to the Series 6 opening episode "The Impossible Astronaut" with the picture of an astronaut cover of the book, and even closer to the title of the second episode "Day of the Moon" with the plot taking place on the Moon, but it still seems pretty cool.

Let's hope that Prisoner of the Daleks spurs a reading trend for me, and that the library acquires Apollo 23 when I get in that reading frenzy. Perhaps then I can get a better feel of the Doctor's character in written form and I can write some fan fiction that will never see the light of day.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Mad Man

Dear Blog,

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I wish I could be like the Doctor. The 11th Doctor, mainly, but with my own spin or flare to it. But let's face it, if I were to suddenly become a Time Lord and wind up with my own TARDIS, I'd end up being very similar to the 11th Doctor, even without having seen Matt Smith's version prior to the random shift in my life.

I came about this realization (again) while watching Thor at the movies. I know, a tad confusing, so here's my attempt to articulate my thought process. While watching Thor swing Mjölnir around, I really wanted to be a part of that superhero world. Not Thor himself, per se, but a superhero. Someone with abilities above and beyond the boundaries of standard humans. I wanted to be in a world where I could fly, toss thugs around, be generally awesome. I thought about it after the movie, and decided if I were to be a superhero, I'd be like Tony Stark or Batman, using my smarts to be awesome.

But then I thought further. If I were to truly become immersed in a world as a hero-like figure, I wouldn't be able to be wacky as someone like Batman, or goofy if I were a Jedi, or random if I were a starship captain in Star Trek. I'd have to be like the Doctor. A Time Lord character. All of time and space to fulfill my nearly overcurious mind. I could do whatever I wanted, and still save people. Not just a city, but a universe to save. Anywhere, anytime. I would be there. I'd meet lots of interesting people, and yeah, I'd run a lot. But life wouldn't be boring. I would be able to learn all the time.

And when I think of this, being a Time Lord, not a companion or a Time Agent (that's what Captain Jack Harkness was, right?), I get so excited. I also get quite sad. Because as much as I wish for it all, the adventure, the travel, the people, and sonic screwdriver, I know I won't be able to have it. It's like a crush from reality most every time the episodes end. I am not a mad man with a box. A little depressing, it's true, but I get over it and go about my day.

Now that I think about it, perhaps I can be a mad man with a box. Yes, I can try and find a costume to wear for special occasions. And perhaps I could one day build a TARDIS to play around in. But for now, I think I should go ahead and have those adventures. Not in the real world, but on paper. I should write my own stories, create my own version of the Doctor. I mean, I still need to learn how to vlog, and my summer is starting off a tad dull, why not throw in a miniature challenge? I probably won't get around to it, but at least the idea is born, no? A sort of mind exercise to begin with, in hopes that it will slowly compel me to jot down those creations over time. I like the idea, and it makes me happy. Not won't need my legs to outrun the Slitheen, just my fingers typing away on the keyboard.

A mad man with a keyboard? I like the sound of that.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Finally Finished with Finals Fun

Dear Blog,

It has been a long while since I've written to you, Blog. After Osama bin Laden was killed, I have had quite a lot going on in my life. The past couple of weeks were a tad hectic, especially the final few days.

I had my final week of classes, then a week of finals. My final grades aren't as high as I would have liked them to be, but considering I have a pretty good social/work life in addition to school, I can't complain in that regard. I tried my best without overworking myself and the result is more than satisfactory. Even if I achieved all As, I would inevitably wish for higher grades. Next semester, I hope to better manage my time. Although I've pretty sure I said that about this last semester, too.

Finals week consisted of finals for the first three days for me, then checking-out residents from my building the next couple of days, and ultimately moving out of my room and into Sunvilla for my summer RA duties on the last day. Finals, as I said before, went well. I'm pretty sure I passed all my classes with high marks.

But man, check-outs were a bit stressful. I can't tell you exact stories of specific residents, but the over-arching theme of check-outs was laziness. Not signing up for a check-out time, not following the check-out procedures, not listening, and just a general sense of immaturity. All of it was a factor for most residents. Granted, a few were prepared, ready, and a delight to check-out, but they were few and far between compared to the residents who seemed to think that rules are made to be ignored. Whenever I charged for damages, I didn't feel bad. But some moms sure tried to make me feel bad. I really wanted to set the parents aside and say "You wouldn't be treating me like this if you knew what your son really did here at college this past year." I'm not the bad guy in the situation, be it saying a room isn't clean enough for check-outs or charging for damages, so I wish they would stop trying to pin the blame on me.

After all the residents left the building, it was time for me to pack up my stuff, too. And by time for me to pack up, the task fell upon Nikki's shoulders when she saw how much work was still left to do in the packing process. Nikki opted to help me pack, which resulted in her doing anywhere between 70%-90% of the work involved. She didn't have to pack up my room and she knew it. But without her help, I wouldn't have gone to sleep that night, so I am grateful for her help. She even offered her car and apartment to store some of my stuff during the Woods to Sunvilla transition.

After I was checked out of Woods Saturday morning, I went to Nikki's apartment and waited for my family to drive down. And when I say waited, I mean napped. After a couple hours of much needed rest, Nikki and I got Chick-fil-A for lunch. Shortly after finishing our meal, my parents arrived and then we went to the mall (Nikki stayed at her apartment since she had a hair appointment that afternoon). After shopping, I finally got a new HDTV and Blu-ray player. I am very excited about both!

From shopping to Sunvilla, my parents helped me carry everything into my room. We ate dinner at Village Inn, then the family left for home. Nikki then delivered the rest of my stuff from her car. She and I unpacked my things for a bit, I went on rounds a couple of times (while she stayed and set up my HDTV), and she left about 11. I completed my final set of rounds, calling Bethany toward to end to check in with her, then it was shower and bedtime.

The next day, I worked the front desk of Sunvilla for eight hours, spent more time with Nikki as we shopped for food and random items. I picked up Portal 2 from her apartment after we ate pizza she cooked with her pizza oven, and basically hung out until 10. I called Bethany and talked to her, took a shower, went to bed for a bit, then came here to the Kentwood Front Desk for the 4am-8am shift.

I haven't seen a single person so far on this shift, aside from the desk worker that was here before me and a random Missouri State maintenance dude outside. I was able to watch an interesting documentary on the Pixar, and even the latest episode of Doctor Who. With an hour left in my shift, I decided an entry was in order.

After this crazy period of intersession madness is over, the summer will start and I will be able to relax a bit. I have a lot of hopes and ambitions for the summer, which include playing plenty of video games, reading some books, doing well in my summer classes, watching shows, writing stories, and just generally trying to find myself a bit more.

Well, that about wraps it up. I hope I will be logging some more entires soon. Possibly some fiction or poetry might be featured. Who knows what the future will hold?

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Osama bin Laden is Dead

Dear Blog,

Today, May 1st, 2011, President Barack Obama announced to the world that Osama bin Laden, mastermind behind the September 11 attacks on the United States of America, had been killed in Pakistan by U.S.-led forces.



Following is the text of Obama's statement to America:

Tonight, I can report to the American people and to the world that the United States has conducted an operation that killed Osama bin Laden, the leader of al Qaeda, and a terrorist who's responsible for the murder of thousands of innocent men, women and children.

It was nearly 10 years ago that a bright September day was darkened by the worst attack on the American people in our history. The images of 9/11 are seared into our national memory. Hijacked planes cutting through a cloudless September sky.

The Twin Towers collapsing to the ground. Black smoke billowing up from the Pentagon. The wreckage of Flight 93 in Shanksville, Pennsylvania where the actions of heroic citizens saved even more heartbreak and destruction.

And yet we know that the worst images are those that were unseen to the world. The empty seat at the dinner table.

Children who were forced to grow up without their mother or their father. Parents who would never know the feeling of their child's embrace.

Nearly 3,000 citizens taken from us, leaving a gaping hole in our hearts.

On September 11th, 2001, in our time of grief, the American people came together. We offered our neighbors a hand, and we offered the wounded our blood. We reaffirmed our ties to each other and our love of community and country.

On that day, no matter where we came from, what god we prayed to or what race or ethnicity we were, we were united as one American family. We were also united in our resolve, to protect our nation and to -- to bring those who committed this vicious attack to justice.

We quickly learned that the 9/11 attacks were carried out by al Qaeda, an organization headed by Osama bin Laden, which had openly declared war on the United States and was committed to killing innocents in our country and around the globe. And so we went to war against al Qaeda, to protect our citizens, our friends, and our allies.

Over the last 10 years, thanks to the tireless and heroic work of our military and our counterterrorism professionals, we've made great strides in that effort. We've disrupted terrorist attacks and strengthened our homeland defense.

In Afghanistan, we removed the Taliban government which had given bin Laden and al Qaeda safe haven and support. And around the globe, we worked with our friends and allies to capture or kill scores of al Qaeda terrorists including several who were a part of the 9/11 plot.

Yet, Osama bin Laden avoided capture and escaped across the Afghan border into Pakistan. Meanwhile, al Qaeda continued to operate from along that border and operate through its affiliates across the world.

And so shortly after taking office, I directed Leon Panetta, the director of the CIA, to make the killing or capture of bin Laden the top priority of our war against al Qaeda. Even as we continued our broader efforts to disrupt, dismantle and defeat his network.

Then last August, after years of painstaking work by our intelligence community, I was briefed on a possible lead to bin Laden. It was far from certain. And it took many months to run this thread to ground.
I met repeatedly with my national security team as we developed more information about the possibility that we had located bin Laden hiding within a compound deep inside Pakistan.

And finally, last week, I determined that we had enough intelligence to take action and authorized an operation to get Osama bin Laden and bring him to justice.

Today, at my direction, the United States launched a targeted operation against that compound in Abad Abad, Pakistan. A small team of Americans carried out the operation with extraordinary courage and capability. No Americans were harmed. They took care to avoid civilian casualties.

After a firefight, they killed Osama bin Laden and took custody of his body.

For over two decades, bin Laden has been al Qaeda's leader and symbol and has continued to plot attacks against our country and our friends and allies.

The death of bin Laden marks the most significant achievement to date in our nation's effort to defeat al Qaeda.

And his death does not mark the end of our effort. There's no doubt that al Qaeda will continue to pursue attacks against us. We must and we will remain vigilant at home and abroad.

As we do, we must also reaffirm that the United States is not and never will be at war with Islam. I've made clear just as President Bush did shortly after 9/11 that our war is not against Islam. Bin laden was not a Muslim leader. He was a mass murderer of Muslims. Indeed, al Qaeda slaughtered scores of Muslims in many countries including our own.

So his demise should be welcomed by all who believe in peace and human dignity. Over the years, I've repeatedly made clear that we would take action within Pakistan if we knew where bin Laden was. That is what we've done.

But it's important to note that our counterterrorism cooperation with Pakistan helped lead us to bin Laden and the compound where he was hiding. Indeed, bin Laden had declared war against Pakistan as well and ordered attacks against the Pakistani people.

Tonight I called President Zardari, and my team has also spoken with their Pakistani counterparts. They agree that this is a good and historic day for both of our nations. And going forward, it is essential that Pakistan continue to join us in the fight against al Qaeda and its affiliates.

The American people did not choose this fight. It came to our shores and started with the senseless slaughter of our citizens. After nearly 10 years of service, struggle and sacrifice, we know well the costs of war.

These efforts weigh on me every time I, as commander in chief, have to sign a letter to a family that has lost a loved one or look into the eyes of a service member who's been gravely wounded.

So Americans understand the costs of war. Yet as a country, we will never tolerate our security being threatened, nor stand idly by when our people have been killed. We will be relentless in defense of our citizens and our friends and allies. We will be true to the values that make us who we are.

And on nights like this one, we can say to those families who have lost loved ones to al Qaeda's terror, justice has been done.

Tonight we give thanks to the countless intelligence and counterterrorism professionals who've worked tirelessly to achieve this outcome. The American people do not see their work nor know their names, but tonight they feel the satisfaction of their work and the result of their pursuit of justice.

We give thanks for the men who carried out this operation, for they exemplify the professionalism, patriotism and unparalleled courage of those who serve our country. And they are part of a generation that has borne the heaviest share of the burden since that September day.

Finally, let me say to the families who lost loved ones on 9/11, that we have never forgotten your loss, nor wavered in our commitment to see that we do whatever it takes to prevent another attack on our shores.

And tonight, let us think back to the sense of unity that prevailed on 9/11. I know that it has, at times, frayed. Yet today's achievement is a testament to the greatness of our country and the determination of the American people.

The cause of securing our country is not complete, but tonight we are once again reminded that America can do whatever we set our mind to. That is the story of our history. Whether it's the pursuit of prosperity for our people or the struggle for equality for all our citizens, our commitment to stand up for our values abroad, and our sacrifices to make the world a safer place.

Let us remember that we can do these things not just because of wealth or power, but because of who we are, one nation under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all.
Thank you. May God bless you. And may God bless the United States of America.


"I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction." -Clarence Darrow

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 30 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 30 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 30 — Whatever Tickles Your Fancy

Nikki and I saw Spamalot today. It was so amazingly funny!
I then helped her move into her apartment.
I honor of the musical, here's a neat clip.



Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 29 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 29 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 29 — Hopes, Dreams and Plans for the Next 365 Days

I hope to have a reasonably accurate Doctor Who costume by either the finale of Season 6 or Halloween.
I hope over the next 365 days I am able to improve upon my RA skills and design better programs, create nicer decorations, and execute my duties with confidence, all while leader my floor (and the building) in a positive direction.
I also hope to have the Community Development collateral next year so that I manage the Woods House Twitter account and Facebook page, create a weekly Woods House vlog, and fashion Floor Wars with a Star Wars theme, all in hopes of spurring more participation.
I dream that I will find the motivation to lose some weight, build some cardiovascular endurance and strength, and live a slightly healthier life.
I plan to plan better, including acquiring a new planner to keep track of dates and times of activities, attending more Phi Sigma Pi events, engaging with the campus more, attending more programs hosted by other RAs and Hall Council, all while balancing a social life and leaving time for myself to watch movies, play games, read, or whatever I wish to unwind in some sort of tranquil solitude.
I hope that I am able to be happier with myself.
I plan to focus on my actions and strive to be a good friend.
I dream that I may be able to write more and somehow get published.
I plan to enjoy summer blockbuster movies that I've been wanting to see for a long while.
I plan to watch new episodes of my favorite shows as soon as possible and not have to watched three or four episodes to catch up.
I dream that I may make a positive impact in the world, even if it is small.
I hope I am respected by my floor.
I plan to rethink my approaches to conflict.
I hope that I am able to manage stress.
I dream that I may find my true purpose in life.

Until next time,
-Daniel Golden

Day 28 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 28 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 28 — This Year, In Great Detail



Well...
I've just been living life, you know?

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 27 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 27 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 27 — This Month, In Great Detail

Glancing at my planner, I can see that:
I was on duty for the first weekend of the month.
I worked the desk the next weekend.
I helped interview for a new hall staff position.
Attended the Phi Sigma Pi Induction of the Alpha Epsilon class (sorry, cool yet secret stuff happened).
Helped with Showcase by giving tours of Woods House, saw the family and got new pants, then helped with a game of Quidditch at Scholar's House, and then went to Founder's Day party.
Next weekend consisted of long Easter Break desk shifts.
This week featured a lot of programs, papers, presentations, and other general "To-Do List" tasks.
Next month? Portal 2.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 26 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 26 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 26 — Your Week, In Great Detail

My memory fails me in an epic way, so I decline to elaborate on my week in great detail.

If I survive the next three weeks, my prize will be getting the video game Portal 2. It look quite awesome.



Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 25 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 25 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 25 — Your Day, in Great Detail

Monday, April 25, 2011

Woke up about 8:00AM.
Class from 8:35AM to 11:35AM.
First was Introduction to Clinical Psychology. Listened to a presentations on Veterans and PTSD which reminded me to work on my presentation for that class.
Next class was Mark Twain, in which a few presentations were given and I was reminded to prepare my presentation for that class.
Next class was Psychology of Humor. Teacher was ill, but taught class anyway. No class on Wednesday. Cool.
Lunch in Garst with Eureka thanks to my iPhone. Saw David and congratulated him on his engagement to Aleigha. Ate a very yummy toasted turkey sandwich.
Searched for information on a few projects after lunch, then shifted to RA research and preparation, then distracted by Membase.
RHA at 4. Nikki poked fun at my reoccurring theme of a potty break before meeting. Bought candy and a Pepsi Max beforehand, after the potty break. The fact that I had a Pepsi Max confused Nikki. Cookies during committee meeting were yummy. Representative from Chartwells talked to RHA. Then I answered every robot related trivia question that day. Felt very awesome.
Only coffee makers allowed in ResLife rooms now. California fire code approved bed cushions only, too. Discussed proposal for RA walkie-talkies. I loved the idea. Half of the small number present didn't. I thought they were odd.
I came off rude to Nikki by mistake directly after meeting.
Dinner with Bethany shortly thereafter.
Apologized to Nikki with the gifts of puppy pictures later, and then talked to Nikki. Apology accepted, we're still awesome.
Struggled with homework. Requested extension on paper. It was granted. Showered, then went to bed early. Watched rest of Eureka episode in bed on the iPhone, then had an amazing night's sleep.

Technically, this blog isn't late, because I had to go through my entire day before posting it.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 24 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 24 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 24 — Whatever Tickles Your Fancy

I'm just going to find quotes from the Doctor and post them one here because since the start of the sixth season, I've been in a very Doctor Who mood. I would love to be the Doctor. To be that fantastic, wonderfully humorous, massively intelligent and brilliant, slightly wacky, lovable, savior of everyone just because I could character.

9th
Rose: Who are you?
The Doctor: [turns around] Do you know like we were sayin'? About the Earth revolving? [walks towards Rose] It's like when you're a kid. The first time they tell you that the world's turning and you just can't quite believe it 'cause everything looks like it's standin' still. [looks at Rose] I can feel it. [takes Rose's hand] The turn of the Earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinnin' at 1,000 miles an hour and the entire planet is hurtling around the sun at 67,000 miles an hour, and I can feel it. We're fallin' through space, you and me, clinging to the skin of this tiny little world, and if we let go... [lets go of Rose's hand] That's who I am.

10th
Rickston Slade: Hang on a minute. Who put you in charge? And who in the hell are you anyway?
The Doctor: I'm the Doctor. I'm a Time Lord. I'm from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasterborous. I'm 903 years old, and I'm the man who's gonna save your lives and all six billion people on the planet below. You got a problem with that?
Slade: No.
The Doctor: In that case: Allons-y!

11th
Amy Pond: I thought... well, I started to think you were just a madman with a box.
The Doctor: Amy Pond, there's something you better understand about me, 'cause it's important and one day your life may depend on it. [Smiles] I am definitely a madman with a box.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 23 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 23 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 23 — A YouTube Video

Just one video to represent my love of YouTube? Too hard to do.
This one is fun, though. I'm a big fan of charlieissocoollike. He's got very entertaining videos. And he's a Doctor Who fan!



And here is a playlist consisting of twenty videos for those not acquainted with the vlogbrothers. Here is their description of themselves.
Nerdy to the Power of Awesome
Hank and John Green are nerdy brothers who make videos. Really, it's not about anything in particular. Whether we're talking about our lives, making each other laugh, or trying to get something more important across, people seem to enjoy it.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden

Day 22 of the 30 Day Blog Challenge

Dear Blog,

Here is my Day 22 entry for the 30 Day Blog Challenge.

Day 22 — A Website

As a big fan if the Internet, I find it hard to choose only a few sites to mention in this entry. I guess I'll just jot down my most frequently visited sites (thanks for keeping me informed, Google Chrome!).
Note: Yeah, I'm totally going to find definitions about this sites from the Internet, too.

Facebook.com
Facebook (stylized facebook) is a social networking service and website launched in February 2004, operated and privately owned by Facebook, Inc. As of January 2011, Facebook has more than 600 million active users. Users may create a personal profile, add other users as friends, and exchange messages, including automatic notifications when they update their profile. Additionally, users may join common interest user groups, organized by workplace, school or college, or other characteristics. The name of the service stems from the colloquial name for the book given to students at the start of the academic year by university administrations in the United States to help students get to know each other better. Facebook allows anyone who declares themselves to be at least 13 years old to become a registered user of the website.

Any website that allows me to connect to my friends from around the world is worth mentioning. I go onto Facebook everyday and it is very useful for talking to people and getting ideas across.

Pandora.com
Pandora Radio is a USA only, automated music recommendation service and custodian of the Music Genome Project. Users enter a song or artist that they enjoy, and the service responds by playing selections that are musically similar. Users provide feedback on approval or disapproval of individual songs, which Pandora takes into account for future selections.
While listening, users are offered the ability to buy the songs or albums at various online retailers. Over 400 different musical attributes are considered when selecting the next song. These 400 attributes are combined into larger groups called focus traits. There are 2,000 focus traits. Examples of these are rhythm syncopation, key tonality, vocal harmonies, and displayed instrumental proficiency.

It's nice to have a website that provides me music tailored to my interests. I've gotten to the point where I don't skip songs because it plays what I like, new music or songs I've heard a dozen times before.

Amazon.com
Amazon.com, Inc. is a US-based multinational electronic commerce company. Headquartered in Seattle, Washington, it is the largest online retailer in the United States, with nearly three times the Internet sales revenue of the runner up, Staples, Inc., as of January 2010.
Jeff Bezos founded Amazon.com, Inc. in 1994 and the site went online in 1995. The company was originally named Cadabra, Inc., but the name was changed when it was discovered that people sometimes heard the name as "Cadaver". The name Amazon.com was chosen because the Amazon River is one of the largest rivers in the world and so the name suggests large size, and also in part because it starts with "A" and therefore would show up near the beginning of alphabetical lists. Amazon.com started as an online bookstore, but soon diversified, selling DVDs, CDs, MP3 downloads, computer software, video games, electronics, apparel, furniture, food, and toys. Amazon has established separate websites in Canada, the United Kingdom, Germany, France, Italy, Japan, and China. It also provides international shipping to certain countries for some of its products.

I can pretty much get anything I want from Amazon. Books, movies, music, games, anything. It's such a nice place.

Memebase.com
The term Internet meme (pronounced /ˈmiːm/, rhyming with "cream") is used to describe a concept that spreads via the Internet. The term is a reference to the concept of memes, although the latter concept refers to a much broader category of cultural information. This site focuses on most Internet memes and showcases them.

Hilariousness abound! I love going here. Some days I laugh a ton. Other I shrug at the jokes. It's interesting, for sure.

Netflix.com
Netflix, Inc., commonly just Netflix, (NASDAQ: NFLX) is an American corporation that offers both on-demand video streaming over the internet, and flat rate online video rental (rental-by-mail) of DVD-Video and Blu-ray Disc in the United States and Canada (streaming only).

The reason I got to watch Doctor Who without spending a ton of money on DVDs. And I still get my parents' money's worth through the instant streaming service. And Star Trek will go online in July! Huzzah!

ThinkGeek.com
ThinkGeek is an American online retailer that caters to computer enthusiasts and other "geeky" social groups. Their merchandise includes clothing, electronic and scientific gadgets, unusual computer peripherals, office toys, pet toys, child toys, and caffeinated drinks and candy. ThinkGeek was founded in 1999, is based in Fairfax, Virginia, and is owned by Geeknet.

Most of my shirts from this site. I love it! You almost can't go wrong if you buy a gift for me from this site.

Wikipedia.org
Wikipedia (i /ˌwɪkɪˈpiːdi.ə/ or i /ˌwɪkiˈpiːdi.ə/ WIK-i-PEE-dee-ə) is a free, web-based, collaborative, multilingual encyclopedia project supported by the non-profit Wikimedia Foundation. Its 18 million articles (over 3.6 million in English) have been written collaboratively by volunteers around the world, and almost all of its articles can be edited by anyone with access to the site. Wikipedia was launched in 2001 by Jimmy Wales and Larry Sanger and has become the largest and most popular general reference work on the Internet, ranking around seventh among all websites on Alexa and having 365 million readers.

Whenever I want to figure something out, I head here first. It's reasonably accurate and I never use it is a scholarly sense.

YouTube.com
YouTube is a video-sharing website on which users can upload, share, and view videos, created by three former PayPal employees in February 2005.
The company is based in San Bruno, California, and uses Adobe Flash Video and HTML5 technology to display a wide variety of user-generated video content, including movie clips, TV clips, and music videos, as well as amateur content such as video blogging and short original videos. Most of the content on YouTube has been uploaded by individuals, although media corporations including CBS, BBC, Vevo, Hulu and other organizations offer some of their material via the site, as part of the YouTube partnership program.
Unregistered users may watch videos, and registered users may upload an unlimited number of videos. Videos that are considered to contain potentially offensive content are available only to registered users 18 and older. In November 2006, YouTube, LLC was bought by Google Inc. for $1.65 billion, and now operates as a subsidiary of Google.

Procrastination's favorite tool.

There are tons more sites I could list, but this should be enough for you, Blog, and for the historians.

Until next time!
-Daniel Golden